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We the Lovers

When there is a conflict in a family, home can feel like a war zone, perhaps worse. In a war zone, you would feel the presence of enemies, but when conflict arises between dear ones—whoof! May the Lord help! You would not wish this horrendous pain upon even the worst enemies. Lord Jesus encourages us, ‘Love thine enemies.’ Were he here today, when even dear ones struggle to love each other, what would he say?

The Master undergoes great pain seeing his loved ones engaged in conflict, despite his working for each individual’s growth as well as the growth of the system so that the world can also experience the heavenly gift of pranahuti, through our efforts.

At any cost, we must resolve this problem, the earlier the better. If we fail, the Master remains a helpless victim seeing the disciple rejected by Nature. Master is not the one who does this ugly job of rejecting anyone. We disconnect ourselves due to trivial matters, and with great pain and reluctance, he resigns the responsibility.

When conflict arises in a relationship, each person tends to blame the other. Even while you are listening to me, you may be thinking, ‘It is not my fault: so-and-so is responsible.’ This sentiment is quite understandable, since our ego is so strong and so tricky—tricky enough to fool even the most advanced devotee. However, it would be much better to imagine being in the other person’s situation—the person whom you blame.

Such oft-repeated episodes of mutual blame do not facilitate spiritual growth, but, in fact, have the opposite effect. Since the individual is deliberate in his actions, Master remains a helpless spectator.

Serving the Great Master,
our Beloved

The first and foremost requirement is to live by the Ten Maxims, without exception. To follow these maxims in both word and spirit is mandatory for all disciples, even though we share them later with new seekers. Without following these principles, no success can be expected.

However, do not be discouraged. Remain optimistic and quickly arrive at a stage planned by the great Master. Let us support this goal by making our lifestyle a prototype that can be easily followed by our children and others who witness our spiritual journey.

Be grateful with all your heart that dear Babuji formulated these principles for all of our benefit. The more we accept these principles and live by them, the greater our expansion of consciousness shall be, and, incrementally, we will actualize our full potential.

Often, despite efforts and best intentions, we still do not succeed. This seeming failure becomes a blessing when we take it as a challenge. There is always room for improvement, but also for deterioration. We have only one kavach or protection, against curvatures or, worse, a complete U-turn from the spiritual path. That protection is to remain ever absorbed in His loving remembrance. Remembrance must never descend into mental jugglery and become a burden, understanding that it is the ‘beloved’ whom we are remembering. Can you recollect a moment in which you wanted to do something wrong, but suddenly, you remembered the Great Master with all your heart? How did that moment resolve? This defines who we are.

चुपके चुपके दर्द हर उम्मीद उठा कर ले गया,
दिल के दरवाजे पे उसके याद का पहरा न था

chupake chupake dard har ummeed utha kar le gaya,
dil ke daravaaje pe usake yaad ka pahara na tha.

Silently, pain took away every hope,
Remembrance of the Beloved was not standing guard at the doors to the heart

Our love for our children helps us to understand them. This understanding helps us know them better. Love always precedes understanding, and further leads to knowledge. It even helps us grasp the nature of qualities such as kshama, aarjav, daya, santosh and satya [forgiveness or tolerance, sincerity, compassion, contentment, and truthfulness]. Such qualities are the foundation of our spiritual empire. Just as love for our children helps us understand them better, our love for these qualities will help us realize their true significance. To understand these qualities, start by holding them in high esteem. I remain mesmerized when reading about these five qualities in the Ashtavakra Gita, where they are given as prerequisites for spiritual evolution; and what greater joy than to see how dear Babuji has woven them into the Ten Maxims with so much simplicity.

Do not argue, for whenever you do you tear apart the essence. Truth is lost in arguments. During spiritual assemblies, especially, one should strictly avoid the inclination to prove one’s point of view. If you truly are a lover, you will never fight to the extent that love itself is destroyed. Are we the lovers, if not of each other, at least of the one who loves all? I think most of us will agree that, yes, we all love our Master. Let us make this sentiment dynamic and a way of life.

The way to realize God is simple. Avoid using a crane to lift a small needle. Lovers cannot handle complexity. They abide in simplicity and in simplicity lies perfection. What is meant by animal-man, human and divine Purusha? A divine Purusha is one in whom there is simplicity and perfection, in whom dwells Divinity that remains unmasked, and in whom selfishness—whether for individual welfare or for one’s own family and grandchildren—is totally non-existent.

If the self is transcended, how can there be selfishness? If selfishness of any sort still prevails and confuses the person, take it for granted that they have yet to start their spiritual journey. Arriving at a stage of Prabhu, one becomes divine Purusha. Divine Purusha is one who has allowed oneself to be totally engulfed by Divinity.

So, the disciple must abandon all selfishness, all selfish compulsions from the heart. A heart lacking selfishness becomes a worthy instrument in the hands of the Almighty. In such a heart, divine impulses arise in place of selfish instincts. The Almighty—the Great Master— works through us and experiences through us. A selfless heart thus becomes the perfect instrument.

In the beginning, these priceless moments of selflessness are sporadic, but gradually, they occur more often. When we remain busy with AEIOU [my acronym for acquiring the condition, enlivening the condition, imbibing the condition, becoming one with it, and finally, being united with the condition], a time comes when the frequency and duration of these moments multiplies to such an extent that selflessness becomes our primary nature!

Grandeur

What is grandeur, or dignity, in a seeker of God? It is perhaps most easily understood by contrasting it with its opposite. First, imagine a married couple who honour and respect one another—a praiseworthy situation. Now, imagine a day when the husband publicizes certain traits of his wife. This act of dishonour by the husband, this destruction of sanctity, displays his lack of dignity or grandeur.

The grandeur of being a disciple of the chain of Elders overseeing the great tradition of Sahaj Marg that is connected with the Ultimate is no small thing. Imagine the level of responsibility each disciple has on account of this pious connection, where the Elders assume total responsibility for insignificant beings like us. Let us, at the least, maintain our grandeur with a demeanor that reflects the nature of that pious connection. First, let us learn not to criticize our brothers and sisters who are still learning the most basic lessons of the spiritual path. Let us not be vocal with relentless sarcasm. Let us refrain from unforgivable gossip. In essence, we should keep our lips sealed and our hearts open.

Now, imagine how much more is required from a disciple toward the Elders of this tradition! Instead, however, some of us are relentless, putting the Guide under the microscope for all their life. I would not infringe upon your freedom to waste your time in this manner. The Elders will also remain mere spectators, witnessing one more sheep falling into the bottomless valley. They are not so arrogant as to punish us when we think of them with even slight aversion, but, at that moment, observe what happens to your inner lightness. Don’t claim that you are not sensitive enough to feel it.

Why am I mentioning grandeur again and again—the grandeur in restraining oneself from verbally crucifying one of our own? It is because on this grandeur hinges the spiritual connection, and hence the spiritual destiny, with the Great Master. The moment I become indignant, I instantly lose that connection. Does the Great Master have the heart to disconnect his loved ones? It is we ourselves who design our own destinies with our own attitudes, not only with the Elders but also with the whole of existence. By being mutually generous with love and respect toward one other, we express our most esteemed reverence toward the Great Master and the very tradition, the Sahaj Marg Paddhati. To do otherwise is to insult the Great Master. Under such a scenario, Nature, the giver of everything, sees my flaws and holds me back until I master my tendencies. How, then, can I expect even salvation, let alone liberation or merger?

We, the Sahaj Margis, must rise above all discord and begin to honour our differences.

By honouring differences, we express our respect. The Spartan spirit, so necessary on the spiritual path, does not mean devouring the other; rather, it means devouring one’s own arrogance. Pathfinders cannot afford to lose this Spartan spirit. What is required is correct thinking and right understanding. To know the other’s viewpoint and respect it, in spite of all differences, requires understanding. Once we understand, we will surely know the other. But to react and dash off critical emails with litanies of complaints is behaviour that is not worthy of a disciple. What becomes of our lion spirit when we complain?

Do not expect anything like growth in your social status, financial strength, or superb health, just because you are treading upon the spiritual path. Some inconveniences or miseries are always present and are to be taken as blessings. But what do we do? We insult the great Master and call him all kinds of names in unspoken silence. Acceptance demands generosity of heart. The bigger the heart, the greater a person’s spirit. What is the use of a stingy heart when you already have everything? Only small individuals have stingy and miserly hearts. Great persons will always be known for their hearts’ generosity, despite a lack of affluence. Lalaji did not even blink an eye in the face of so much suffering, all through his life.

In the Ramayana, Lord Rama conveys that there is no greater tragedy than poverty, since it makes us dependent on others. True freedom occurs when this dependency no longer troubles us. If spiritual life makes one irresponsible, if it enslaves one with dependency, then that sort of spirituality is not worth pursuing. The ideal is freedom—not only freedom but such freedom where even the idea of freedom is no longer present.

Freedom from freedom is the real freedom. – Babuji

Beloved Master coined the slogan, ‘Love all whom He loves.’ The question arises as to whom He does not love! Love shines like the sun, equally upon all. However, only some benefit from that love, while most do not. How and why? It is worth pondering.

Love all whom He loves. - Chariji

All are bound by this invisible force called love, and it is our ardent duty to make this invisible force visible through our behaviour and actions. The atman is also invisible, but without this life-force, one becomes a mere corpse. The essence of love pervades through all dimensions. While thinking of our loved ones who are no more, haven’t we felt their love touching our hearts? How does that happen? Dimensions are meaningless when it comes to the power of love.

Sahaj Marg is a simple path to realize God. The practice is even simpler. The help from the Great Master is instantaneous. The philosophy is also easy to understand. Then what is the hindrance? Why am I still where I am? What can be done? Do my thought patterns, behaviours and actions lighten my heart, or do they create heaviness? What happens to others’ hearts when I entertain something not so nice about them? Permit such questions, let your heart express all the concerns candidly to yourself. When the heart asks these questions, please listen carefully and answer them with all honesty. Answering a few fundamental questions, I hope, will open doors, both magical and mysterious. When we recognize our shortcomings, the next step is to correct those defects. If I am unable to correct a defect, I ought to offer prayers considering myself at fault. To consider oneself at fault and express heartfelt apologies during regular bed-time prayers will surely lead to transformation. Offering prayer, expressing helplessness, eyes filled with tears, heart melting with agony—this reaches him faster than one can imagine, and his celestial gift of transformation will surprise us.

There is no harm in considering ourselves to be a little less than our associates. Considering oneself a bit better and higher than the other is a sign of ‘stiffening one’s neck.’ Accidently, it can happen that we wake up in the morning with a stiff neck due to our positioning. We lose the freedom to turn our heads at will. We lose the ability to look sideways, down, or up! A similar thing happens when we ideologically position ourselves: we lose the flexibility in our consciousness, resulting in tunnel vision.

Some philosophers go to the extent of declaring themselves to be sinners. They approach the Lord with hearts filled with remorse, in anticipation of help from the Lord so as to transform themselves. Babuji has quoted a lovely couplet in this regard, praising such an attitude of being at fault and presenting oneself to the Lord as a sinner:

गुनहगारों को देखा जो उनकी रेहमत ने,
तो बहुत ख़फ़ीफ़ हुवे जो गुनेहगार न थ

gunahagaaron ko dekha jo unkee rehamat ne,
to bahut khafeef huve jo gunehagaar na the

When His mercy reached the sinners,
those who were not sinners were affronted or outraged or astounded

The virtuous minded must be thinking,

काश हम भी शायद पापी होते तो कितना अच्छा होता!
kas hum bhi sayad papi hote to kitna achcha hota!

Alas, if we were also sinners, it would have been better!

May they smile seeing us love each other lavishly.